Imperfect Love

Night of the proposal

Night of the proposal


I am someone's wife, wow. When I hear Ziggy call me wife I get all giddy on the inside and I am in awe. My Husband is all I need in this life of sin. When I get a little crazy he calms me. He brings constant balance to my life. We drive each other wild at times and I wouldn't have it any other way. We are not perfect, we fuss, we have disagreements, and at times everything gets turned into a joke. No matter where life takes us, this genuine love prevails every time. Since our wedding, we keep getting asked, "How does it feel to be married?". Honestly, we still feel like "Ziggy and Bri", it's just a lot more love in the equation. While writing my wedding vows I realized the month of January has been very special for us over the past several years. I call it fate. 

January 2014

Ziggy and I began our journey as friends. He was working in UP Cafe, I walked in, and he asked me, "Do you want to come over and watch Netflix"? At the time "Netflix and chill" was really poppin [lol]. I'm thinking he can't be talking to me. I was having an awful day and looking my absolute worse. After seeing his bright eyes and white smile I could not say no. Weeks later we were spending time together watching The Walking Dead on Netflix, talking and laughing all night. No matter how late and freezing cold it was outside, he walked me home to the other side of our complex. He never complained. That's when I knew he was a gentleman. I was in denial about liking him. I was telling myself, "I mean he cute, funny, can dress, but I don't like him", and at the same time I was telling all of my friends about him. I wanted to hang out with him everyday. We talked about everything and we could be ourselves. That's when I knew he was a true friend.

2015:

I started feeling him so much. The energy between us felt surreal, like something out of a fairytale. Our friendship got closer and we became even more fond of each other. For months his home became mine and mine became his. We were truly inseparable and deep down I knew it was love. One night in bed I whispered to him, "I love you" and my heart melted when he said it back. From then on our bond was unbreakable. We would talk about the idea of marriage and love. I knew so much about his family and friends.  January 2015 is when he asked me to meet his mother. That's when I knew he loved me. No matter how tight money was he always surprised me with gifts. That's when I knew he was a provider. I would pray for him and he would pray for me. That's when I knew God sent him.

January 2016

We rekindled and went on our first date. Despite our obstacles, we would always gravitate back to each other. At times we were on rocks and knew we could not be together. As a man he was not ready, and as a woman I had to find my own path. The crazy thing about fate is no matter what the stars above will always align. Four months later he asked me to be his girlfriend. I had never dated someone who was like me in so many ways. We did everything together. Sun up to sundown we shared the same space. We knew we wanted to get married and spend our lives together. He told me, "Next year we're going to get married and I need to know when I make this move you're going to come with me."

December 29, 2017

I had no idea my friends and family were in on our proposal. I can never thank my friends enough for being there. They told me we were going ice skating downtown. As my friends and I were walking towards the tall water fountain downtown, I saw my Husband walking towards me looking like a GAWD! I was in complete shock. My family began coming from every angle and I was completely stunned to say the least. I hugged Ziggy for a long time. He got down on one knee, looked me in my eyes, asked me to marry him and to be his wife. 

January 6, 2018

On the morning of our wedding I woke up super early with my stomach in knots. I was in disbelief of what was transpiring. My sisters and wedding party made my day one to remember. All I could think about was seeing you standing at the other end of the altar. On this day, I got to call you my husband. I was standing in front of my best friend in the whole wide world confessing my love. Ziggy, you elate me. You are my true friend. Years ago I told you I wanted to love everyone you love and I wanted them to love me. You promised I would be your wife this year. You promised to carry me on your back and to provide for us. You have done that and more. Our wedding was the best day of my life. We turnt up with the people we love, we were lit all night, and I had the best time with the love of my life. God took his time and designed you to be so beautiful inside and out. To laugh, love, and have fun with you foreva is my true desire. Our next stop is Japan, I am ready to see where this new life will take us. I love you foreva.

- Your Wife

 

Forever is still Lasting: My Grandmother's Love Story

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Love isn't always easy. It has its ups and downs. Sometimes it makes you wonder if it is worth fighting for. I watched my grandparents love each other throughout my childhood, until God called my granddaddy W.J home. My grandmother was so gracious to share her beautiful everlasting love story and wisdom with you.

We got married on December 17, 1960. Our faith in God played a major role in our marriage.
— Grandma

How did you and grandaddy meet? How did he propose? 

We were in school  together, I was in the 11th grade and we rode the bus together. He was aggravating and I hated him at first [laughs]. Back in the day we (blacks) had one bus. He always liked to sit on the seat next to me and talk. I started dating him in the 12th grade. 

He talked to my daddy about marrying me. He found out if he would be the ideal guy for me. Daddy asked if your granddaddy could take care of me just as good as he could or better. He proposed in front of mama and daddy. A month afterwards, we got married at my house. It was a beautiful wedding. So many people were there, it looked like a church. Mama set the house up real nice. 

How did you know grandaddy was "the one"? 

I figured him out to being a caring home man, who didn't like to "go go go." He always worked, provided, took care of his grandparents, and always cared for older people. After we got married he still did the same thing. He was not the guy to beat on women, he was very protective .

Describe your marriage.  

It was beautiful. He was faithful and always there for me. Back in the day there were house parties, where people had fish fries. He would tell me to go if I wanted to, he never wanted to be in the streets. He was a wonderful husband, not chasing after women, and he didn't chase around with his friends after we married. 

What got you two through tough times? 

 We lived on our own for the first two years. After two years, I moved back home until I could do better. Times were hard after moving into my [current] home. Mama and daddy always helped us out. House payments went up but we worked it out. 

Did forgiveness play a major role in your marriage? 

Yes, it was easy to forgive. I would say sorry and we would figure it out. If I misunderstood him he'd say, "No Betty that ain't right." I could easily say I was sorry if I made a mistake and needed his forgiveness. He would talk around in slang and say, "You know I was just kidding." I would tell him, "No, you have to be serious about what you're saying." He was just as forgiving. 

Describe one of your favorite memories together. 

After we had children, we rode to Rock Hill after Sunday dinner to get ice cream as a family. It was just three kids at the time, we had fun together. 

I grew up seeing you guys together everyday. I saw real love. What advice about love do you give to couples of my generation? 

 I always tell them it's not going to be easy everyday as you think. You may think it'll be roses everyday, but you'll have ups and downs. Reason between what's going on, in order to know how to forgive and treat each other the right way. You have to be re-rooted. Don't just look for the other person to understand you, but understand them also. Like my mama used to say, "Somebody has to have common sense." When you spread your business out amongst everybody, your business is in the streets and it'll make matters worse. Take it out amongst yourselves.

If he was here today, I would be so happy and tell him how much I appreciate and love him.
— Grandma
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Granddaddy, you were an amazing man. I love you for being a disciplined man who loved his family, raised his family, and treated his wife as a true Queen. I pray God blesses me with a marriage this strong. Grandma, you are one of the strongest women I know. You hold our family on your back and it never breaks. I love you Betty Jean. I thank you for sharing your love story and wisdom with everyone.

Some things do last forever. 

Happy Mothers Day! 

Vibin'

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vibe

/vīb/

noun

1. a person's emotional state or the atmosphere of a place as communicated to and felt by others. 

2. The euphoric buzz you have at that time about something. 

 

Let's talk about Vibin'..... 

Being so comfortable with someone that you don't even have to talk. The quiet speaks volumes. Mmm. You're staring at one another, enjoying each other's company. It feels amazing. Now, close your eyes. The energy in the room is fully charged. Energy is transferring, bouncing from body to body. 

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Then, it begins...conversation

There is conversation about life, dreams, goals, fears, and heartache. Nothing is off-limits. But, that's okay, because you are alone together. You won't judge them. They won't judge you. This is what a best friend feels like, so inviting. Secrets are shared and more importantly, kept. Everything seems a lot funnier. Laughing feels like a dose of medicine. Neither of you have to dress to impress. Loose clothing makes it easier to maneuver. The THC makes your mind roam free and your eyes a little lower. Idea's are often discussed. Creative juices are flowing. You both are free in your skin. 

How incredible is that?

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This is a form of romance and intimacy without sex. Whether you realize it or not it's also a form of love. Pure bodies Vibin', forgetting about how crazy things can be. You are away from it all. No one is on Earth but you two. Everything in the room feels warm, light, and inviting. Imagine laying next to someone listening to music, eating your favorite foods, with a muted movie playing on TV. The lights are dim, but bright enough to see each other. You're touching each other, without actually touching. 

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Vibin' feels like euphoria running through your body. It is that butterfly feeling, which is impossible to describe, so intoxicating. Nothing is forced. This is rare. So much is gained from bonding, understanding the corny jokes and feeling so familiar to the other person. It's a free spiritual and mental connection. 

Souls recognize each other by vibes, not by appearances.
— Unknown